Funny stereotypes of specialties

[cq992]

What is the number 1 cause of death among radiologists?
...
...
...
...
Pathologists pulling out of the parking lot at noon.

[nephron]

I heard a good one about the MICU consulting an Oncologist to come say goodbye to a long time patient.

Oncolgist rushed to their demented, trach/PEG’d, end stage cancer patient (to of course try one last dose of chemo) but was distraught to discover the patient was missing.

As it turned out, nephrology had already come by and wheeled the patient off to get one more dialysis session in!

I don't get the joke. Seems like a normal day of rounding in the hospital for me.

[ROdoc13]

This reminds me of a funny rReddit post, which was regarding patients requesting notes from their physicians for COVID19 vaccine exemptions:

u/MoobyTheGoldenSock: "I had one who is also my patient ask me curbside. I said no. She pushed me on it and asked what I'd do if the vaccine killed her. I conceded that if she died from the first shot, I wouldn't make her get the second dose."

To which u/PokeTheVeil replied: "That's how we know you're not an oncologist. An oncologist would bring the second shot to the funeral."

[fatlittlepig]

Patient on OR table just before surgery

Doctor: Don't worry Jason. You can do this.
It's just an usual surgery.

Patient: Doc, my name is not Jason

Doctor: I know. Jason is my name

[MPMD]

Why do they need to put nails in coffins?

1. To stop oncologists from giving another round of chemo.

2. To stop nephrologists from giving another round of dialysis.

Not quite as good as the oncologist/nephrologist combo joke above.


I'm sure some radiologist have some good ones about us ED Docs.

variation that is a little darker:

how do you know that oncology is consulting on your pt?
there's claw marks on the coffin

[MPMD]

a few i like:

what does an orthopod call the heart?
the ancef pump

what do you call 2 orthopods reading an ekg?
a double blind study



i really like the meme online where the surgeon sticks a branch into his front bike wheel, falls to the ground, and shouts "f***ing anesthesia!"

[sleepysurf]

Standard joke from the era of written notes...

The "Orthopedic Progress Note"

As above, see below.
Any change, let me know.

[Curious George]

5/16/22 2 PM Ortho F/U Note:

LGFD.

[Curious George]

LGFD = Looks Good From Door

[mkintx]

...
Pathologists pulling out of the parking lot at noon.

Oh how I wish!!!

[Rando]

What's the difference between a construction worker and an orthopedist?

The construction worker can think of more than one antibiotic.

[VentAlarm]

What's the difference between a construction worker and an orthopedist?

The construction worker can think of more than one antibiotic.

Outstanding.

[Otolith]

ABCs

Anesthesia: Airway Book Chair

Surgery: Arrive Belittle Criticize

Emergency Medicine: Arrive Begin CTscanner

[MPMD]

ABCs

Anesthesia: Airway Book Chair

Surgery: Arrive Belittle Criticize

Emergency Medicine: Arrive Begin CTscanner

actual LOL sitting at my desk

[Tim]

I mean, if there is a bro specialty….

Bro/chick . Fixed that for you too.
With all due respect, Ortho’s have an attitude.
Full disclosure: As a father, my experience is very limited, just to one. Sometimes I comment directly. Usually doesn’t get any change in attitude.