Dating As A Professional

[itsdamon]

Question: What are the main frustrations you're facing in your dating life as a professional? Let's help each other out. Personally, I have a hard time turning off after-hours. Has anyone faced similar problems and found solutions? Let's help each other out.

[Peds]

married before residency. glad i dont have to deal with it.

sorry.

[Brains428]

It says you're a student. Unless you're non-traditional, the dating pool is still open. What's the problem?

[CordMcNally]

I started dating and got married when I was still an amateur. I don't think bringing work home is necessarily specific to medicine. You need to find someone compatible that you share some interests with and enjoy being around. It's the same recipe for professionals and non-professionals.

[Lithium]

It is pretty frustrating and difficult to find the right person. I think it is even harder as you get older and more set in your ways. For me it is not only important to find someone with common interest and a good personality but who doesn't bring too much baggage (previous relationships, divorces, children, pets, etc). Education level is also really important, but more than ever I am pretty judgmental about a prospective date's financial habits. This is mostly stuff I didn't worry about in my 20's and details you don't necessarily learn much about on dating apps prior to spending time and money on people you don't mesh with (though I try my hardest to screen the wrong people out).

My sister after years of fruitless searching says she found someone with a professional matchmaker. I'm not sold on the value, but if you know what you are looking for and have specific ideas of what you AREN'T looking for I can see the utility in having someone else screen out the wrong types. Especially if you are working 60 hours a week and have other things you'd rather do with your free time.

[CM]

itsdamon wrote:

Has anyone faced similar problems

Click to expand...

Dating was terrific fun. It's the stuff of life.

You make it sound like a job.

 

[pistolpete]

I think it's hard dating as a professional if you want to settle down with another professional, as I do. Add in finding someone who I'm physically attracted to, shares my religion, and hasn't been previously married or had kids, and it's incredibly frustrating. So I'm still looking, although I only recently started looking actively since my break up from a long-term relationship last year over religious and financial differences.

[Lordosis]

Been with my wife since sophomore year of undergrad. Got married 4th year of medical school. I could not imagine dating now. No thanks. I will take poopy diapers any day.
Good luck single folk. I hope you find what you are looking for.

[SLC OB]

Lordosis wrote:

Been with my wife since sophomore year of undergrad. Got married 4th year of medical school.

Click to expand...

Same here! Met sophomore year started dating just as 3rd year started, married between 3 and 4th year of med school!

Together 27 years now, 20 married.

Also, a set of twins...

and a bed jet!

Similar paths!

[pistolpete]

SLC OB wrote:

Lordosis wrote:

Been with my wife since sophomore year of undergrad. Got married 4th year of medical school. 

Click to expand…

Same here! Met sophomore year started dating just as 3rd year started, married between 3 and 4th year of med school!

Together 27 years now, 20 married.

Also, a set of twins…

and a bed jet!

Similar paths!

Click to expand...

Congrats! What's your secret to success? How quickly did you know your spouse was The One?

[Lordosis]

I am about a decade behind but I will take it as a good omen!

[SLC OB]

pistolpete wrote:

SLC OB wrote:

Lordosis wrote:

Been with my wife since sophomore year of undergrad. Got married 4th year of medical school. 

Click to expand…

Same here! Met sophomore year started dating just as 3rd year started, married between 3 and 4th year of med school!

Together 27 years now, 20 married.

Also, a set of twins…

and a bed jet!

Similar paths!

Click to expand…

Congrats! What’s your secret to success? How quickly did you know your spouse was The One?

Click to expand...

He's my best friend... when something goes wrong or right, he is who I want to tell... that is a good sign.

Also, on the same page as far as the BIG picture with money. That is huge.

Met as undergrad, so was different that already being a professional... however he is in healthcare too (not a doc) and that is super helpful.

 

[pistolpete]

SLC OB wrote:

pistolpete wrote:

SLC OB wrote:

Lordosis wrote:

Been with my wife since sophomore year of undergrad. Got married 4th year of medical school. 

Click to expand…

Same here! Met sophomore year started dating just as 3rd year started, married between 3 and 4th year of med school!

Together 27 years now, 20 married.

Also, a set of twins…

and a bed jet!

Similar paths!

Click to expand…

Congrats! What’s your secret to success? How quickly did you know your spouse was The One?

Click to expand…

He’s my best friend… when something goes wrong or right, he is who I want to tell… that is a good sign.

Also, on the same page as far as the BIG picture with money. That is huge.

Met as undergrad, so was different that already being a professional… however he is in healthcare too (not a doc) and that is super helpful.

 

Click to expand...

Awesome! And I meant how quickly from the first moment you met him to the moment you knew, "this guy is the one?" If you don't mind sharing, that is.

[SLC OB]

pistolpete wrote:

SLC OB wrote:

pistolpete wrote:

SLC OB wrote:

Lordosis wrote:

Been with my wife since sophomore year of undergrad. Got married 4th year of medical school. 

Click to expand…

Same here! Met sophomore year started dating just as 3rd year started, married between 3 and 4th year of med school!

Together 27 years now, 20 married.

Also, a set of twins…

and a bed jet!

Similar paths!

Click to expand…

Congrats! What’s your secret to success? How quickly did you know your spouse was The One?

Click to expand…

He’s my best friend… when something goes wrong or right, he is who I want to tell… that is a good sign.

Also, on the same page as far as the BIG picture with money. That is huge.

Met as undergrad, so was different that already being a professional… however he is in healthcare too (not a doc) and that is super helpful.

 

Click to expand…

Awesome! And I meant how quickly from the first moment you met him to the moment you knew, “this guy is the one?” If you don’t mind sharing, that is.

Click to expand...

I grew up in a divorced family, so I was skeptical.... I went off to med school and he stayed behind but we still were together. 3 months later his mom got diagnosed with AML so he moved home to care for her and his dad... it was hard but we made it and figured that if we could make it through her death, caring for his needy father, and being apart for so long... it was meant to be.

[wideopenspaces]

This thread reminds me to be grateful I was basically a child bride;-)

OP, regardless of whether you are dating, you need to learn to relax - through meditation, exercise, or hobbies. If you take work home all the time, you're bound to burn out.