I think a SPIA could be part of the plan and agree with others that the house is the big issue. That’s way too big of a mortgage for his retirement income. But if he paid it off and put half of what’s left in a SPIA, it wouldn’t leave him much of a nest egg.
Really hard to do much without knowing what he is/hopes to be spending. If it’s less than $80K or so including that mortgage, he’s probably good to go. If it’s $150K, he’s probably hosed, but maybe you can get close between a SPIA, SS, a reverse mortgage, and an aggressive portfolio withdrawal rate.
The relationship issue is going to be the trickiest part to manage. Everything needs to be his idea. Like the 90 year old I saw yesterday who is now willing to go into assisted living but refused two years ago despite all of her family wanting her to. It’s now her idea because she can’t manage the house any more.
the house only sounded like the biggest problem until we heard about the vacation home.
everyone here will agree that the spending is bigger than the budget. and we probably don't know about all the spending either. I thought he might make it with just the mortgage on the house. no way to feel comfortable that he can make it financially with the vacation home thrown in. unless he is in very poor health.
we have all struggled with how to manage becoming the parent to our elderly parents-whether it is financial, behavioral, medical, emotional.
if he is healthy and still working, I would say it sounds like he needs to keep working--as he doesn't have interest in curtailing his lifestyle and basically sounds like he is telling you that when he gets evicted you can either let him go homeless or taking him into your own home. unfortunately he's not going to change for you--he needs to decide which options under his control he wants to pursue--and you have to support him because he's your dad. I get that at age 70 if I just got divorced I would not want to lose my wife, my money, and now my house and vacation home. I'm sure he is reeling from all the change that is thrust upon him. it may be better to reopen the discussion at some point in the future.
good luck.
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