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  • #16
    I wouldn't recommend going below 20% for retirement even if you have 1M already. Unless you don't spend much at all.. But unless my math is off if 80K drops you from 20% to 15% you guys are making a lot and must be spending a lot?

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    • #17
      Knowing how I felt about medicine and my ability to practice long term before my lawsuit and how I feel afterwards . . . I favor flexibility. I wouldn't want to be locked into an 80k/ year commitment for 13 years because I don't think I'll still be working then.
      Will you probably be fine either way? Yes. But I'd think long and hard about how important this really is to you before making that commitment. Good luck!

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      • #18
        Originally posted by childay View Post
        I wouldn't recommend going below 20% for retirement even if you have 1M already. Unless you don't spend much at all.. But unless my math is off if 80K drops you from 20% to 15% you guys are making a lot and must be spending a lot?
        I don't think they said they were only saving 20%. My guess is that their savings rate is above 20% and taking away the $80k brings them down to 15%.

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        • #19
          I agree that there are so many factors that make this such a personal and individual decision. We used a hybrid approach, sending our children to public schools from K-8 and then to private catholic high schools. My husband’s and my family also followed this model, where as my sisters in law did the opposite (private then public HS). I didn’t feel that our private schools provided better education, but we feel the personal and moral development during the teenage years were beneficial.

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          • #20
            Originally posted by Tim View Post
            “I think it depends on the kid/the school district so it’s a personal decision with many variables.

            I guess I was hoping someone could tell me ‘at $ net worth, you can stop saving >20% in your 30’s’.”

            Congratulations. IF someone gave you a number, what would you do? Personally, you could restate the question: Should I cut current spending or retirement spending to pay for private schools?
            Keep saving 20%.
            This is wise. The real question should include if this is worth cutting spending elsewhere, and working longer.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by zlandar View Post
              What are you going to do about college? I don’t think it’s realistic to shell out $80k/year K-12 then suddenly say “ok you are on your own”. So you could be staring at $60-70k/year per kid college bill if they both went to private college. More if you are talking 15+ years in the future.
              Very wise as well. Yes, to assume a child will go to public university after shelling out for private school seems lacking.

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              • #22
                Originally posted by CordMcNally View Post

                I don't think they said they were only saving 20%. My guess is that their savings rate is above 20% and taking away the $80k brings them down to 15%.
                This is correct. Taking away 80k brings us to <20%, which is uncomfortable. Agree with everyone regarding the ISP.

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by ObgynMD View Post

                  This is correct. Taking away 80k brings us to <20%, which is uncomfortable. Agree with everyone regarding the ISP.
                  I think you have your answer right there. You don't have to start in private in primary school either. We grew up in blue collar public school and then went to private prep school for high school after more financially stable situation in the family finances.

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by StarTrekDoc View Post

                    I think you have your answer right there. You don't have to start in private in primary school either. We grew up in blue collar public school and then went to private prep school for high school after more financially stable situation in the family finances.
                    Agreed. Unless you're in some really awful place I imagine K-6 or so private isn't going to be dramatically better. Certainly a lot of money to pay for questionable benefit.

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                    • #25
                      Financially speaking, it probably doesn't make sense. $80k/yr for 13yrs grows to over $1M. What does that $1M get for your kids in private school? I'm skeptical it'll lead them to a more lucrative career or better life. Maybe you'd rather have that flexibility by keeping them in public, and giving them that extra $1M, if unused, for something like downpayment or their own retirement. Having said that, we're leaning towards private k-12, not necessarily because it'll be a better outcome or education, but just a nice environment for them to spend a majority of their formative years in.

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                      • #26
                        Like everyone said, it’s a personal decision. Financially, it sounds like for you that it won’t matter. You are mid-30s with already 7 digit saving. And you will continue to work for awhile. so if you let this grow and continue to save, you’ll be fine.
                        spend the 80k for private school. Then spend whatever it is for private college. Nothing wrong with this. What are you going to do with all this money anyways when you die? Might as well spend it on something that you feel will help your children.
                        You aren’t handcuffing yourself.
                        but you should have a budget and make sure to save:maintain your already great retirement account.

                        good luck.

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                        • #27
                          The best decision is almost always public school in a great district/school. You get to have your cake (good teachers/small classes/results), eat it too (social skills, diverse exp), and keep your money in your wallet. Of course, the towns/areas with the best schools almost always have the lowest crime, best parks, trails, community events, etc also... so people can whine all day about the HCOL. It's worth it.

                          Assuming that is not an option and you are somewhere where the public schools suck, then private school enters the conversation. I would hire tutors or do private school in the early elementary years. You can let them fend for themselves after that. Extending private school into middle school is ok if you have the cash and your kid is an athlete but wouldn't make the teams at public schools... so you get a benefit of athletics and hopefully a bit better curriculum also. Private high school is hogwash (and that's why so few ppl do it)... the kids need to learn to be social, to be picked on, to compete and lose and compete and win, to be included and to be excluded. You have to take the training wheels off someday. They can simply take honors/AP classes at the public school.

                          Originally posted by childay View Post
                          Agreed. Unless you're in some really awful place I imagine K-6 or so private isn't going to be dramatically better. Certainly a lot of money to pay for questionable benefit.
                          This could not be more wrong.

                          If you are going to do private at all (which should depend on the quality of the public available), those early years are the time to do it. The attitude and curiosity the child creates or doesn't about learning is paramount. The smaller class sizes, classroom aides, better school resources, etc can make the difference between the kid (public or private) thinking math/reading/etc is fun and easy and they enjoy it... versus deciding it's hard and there is not much help to learn it. Those conceptions are not easy to change later on, and the "slow" kids get further and further behind while the achievers tend to do the opposite. You will very seldom find high functioning adults without fantastic early teachers, parents, coaches, etc. The formative aka pre-puberty years are the formative years for a reason. The teachers at those ages also have more time and interest in relationships with parents (generally) due to smaller class sizes.

                          There is much reason why there are MANY more kids who attend private primary school than private high school. The people who say that private high school is more important are simply shooting the arrow first and then painting the bullseye (didn't have the money for private primary so will state HS was better/smarter since that's what they did). It is almost foolhardy to thrust a kid who went to primary and middle school public into a prep/private HS. They will dislike leaving their friends, find most of the new prep school kids dweeby, and could struggle since they have a different background. They will typically hate it (except that they will likely dominate athletics, school dances, etc if they were even semi-competent at those things at the public schools). It is similar to how some kids who do home or private school (especially small homogenous ones) throughout K-12 can find college socialization quite awkward, esp at large university settings.

                          Again, hopefully OP or anyone is in an area where the public are quite adequate and you can just go that route and supplement with home teaching and some extra tutoring and sports/activity. If you need to fire the private tuition money cannons, early is the time to do that, though. No question.
                          Last edited by Max Power; 01-30-2022, 10:05 AM.

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by Sundance View Post


                            With that said he couldn’t believe I spent 30k a year on my kids for their sports

                            Athletics give my kids the best opportunities possible to get into any school they what whereas I’m sure he feels the private route gives his kids those opportunities- there are worse things out there to spend money on with all the money most of us on here make… so if it’s a high priority for you, do it
                            I couldn't imagine spending 30K a year on sports teams.

                            You are in for a big surprise if you think your kids will get into any college, and graduate, because of just athletic ability. The coursework, grades, and test scores matter. Many athletes do not graduate because there has never been an emphasis on academics.

                            There are unfortunately no shortcuts in math, grammar, writing, and reading. It is in the preparation. Many students are not equipped with the basics, including study skills, to be successful students in college.

                            These are just my opinions. It just depends on your priorities.


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                            • #29
                              Originally posted by Max Power View Post
                              The best decision is almost always public school in a great district/school. You get to have your cake (good teachers/small classes/results), eat it too (social skills, diverse exp), and keep your money in your wallet. Of course, the towns/areas with the best schools almost always have the lowest crime, best parks, trails, community events, etc also... so people can whine all day about the HCOL. It's worth it.

                              Assuming that is not an option and you are somewhere where the public schools suck, then private school enters the conversation. I would hire tutors or do private school in the early elementary years. You can let them fend for themselves after that. Extending private school into middle school is ok if you have the cash and your kid is an athlete but wouldn't make the teams at public schools... so you get a benefit of athletics and hopefully a bit better curriculum also. Private high school is hogwash (and that's why so few ppl do it)... the kids need to learn to be social, to be picked on, to compete and lose and compete and win, to be included and to be excluded. You have to take the training wheels off someday. They can simply take honors/AP classes at the public school.

                              This could not be more wrong.

                              If you are going to do private at all (which should depend on the quality of the public available), those early years are the time to do it. The attitude and curiosity the child creates or doesn't about learning is paramount. The smaller class sizes, classroom aides, better school resources, etc can make the difference between the kid (public or private) thinking math/reading/etc is fun and easy and they enjoy it... versus deciding it's hard and there is not much help to learn it. Those conceptions are not easy to change later on, and the "slow" kids get further and further behind while the achievers tend to do the opposite. The formative aka pre-puberty years are the formative years for a reason. The teachers also have more time and interest in relationships with parents (generally).

                              There is much reason why there are MANY more kids who attend private primary school than private high school. The people who say that private high school is more important are simply shooting the arrow first and then painting the bullseye (didn't have the money for private primary so will state HS was better/smarter since that's what they did). It is almost foolhardy to thrust a kid who went to primary and middle school public into a prep/private HS. They will dislike leaving their friends, find most of the new prep school kids dweeby, and could struggle since they have a different background. They will typically hate it (except that they will likely dominate athletics, school dances, etc if they were even semi-competent at those things at the public schools). It is similar to how some kids who do home or private school (especially small homogenous ones) throughout K-12 can find college socialization quite awkward, esp at large university settings.

                              Again, hopefully OP or anyone is in an area where the public are quite adequate and you can just go that route and supplement with home teaching and some extra tutoring and sports/activity. If you need to fire the private tuition money cannons, early is the time to do that, though. No question.
                              I take your points. I am in the public school camp myself also. I get the sense there are good teachers and bad in both public and private. Hard to even evaluate as a parent unless they're exceptional or terrible. My point I suppose was more geared towards situation where the public HS is genuinely awful but not much reason for doctors to be in that situation. I agree more or less with a more diverse / representative public high school benefitting students. Not sure dominating the school dance is most important though lol.

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                              • #30
                                Originally posted by ObgynMD View Post
                                Debating sending both kids to private school from K-12. Assuming that the private school is a better education (huge assumption, I will do my due diligence), I would love feedback from this financially savvy group if it’s financially worth it.

                                Private school for both kids would be ~$80k/yr. It would decrease our future savings rate to ~15%.

                                The upside is we have no student loans, our only debt is our mortgage, and we already have seven digits in retirement savings thanks to my husband who started saving early. We are in our mid/late 30’s and neither of us plan to retire early, but who knows, one OB lawsuit and I might feel differently. I want to keep the flexibility to walk away if needed and am wondering if paying for private school could take that away.

                                Is there a NW where paying $80k/year for private school would be financially responsible?

                                Assuming that private school is actually significantly better (huge assumption, and I don’t want to debate this here- purely want a financial perspective), what would you do?
                                I found it much better value to move somewhere where the public schools met our educational demands and values. It meant moving three times, and a bit of a commute for me, but saving $1,000,000 in K-12 education is completely worth it. Plus we like public schools.

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